Bad Blogger, No Biscuit

Were you all afraid that I was eaten by New Jersey? A warranted fear; the NJ turnpike indeed was designed by a sadistic madman, and I now know the innermost workings of Newark.

Indeed, the shopping extravanganza was epic; it was well worth braving the Garden State. Frenchie and I almost literally shopped til we dropped. I feel spiritually fulfilled, and more importantly, almost fully prepared to re-enter the fray that will be the fall semester. I've already performed the obligatory closet purge to make room for my new purchases (some of which actually involve a trip to the alterations guy--total bummer). But sartorially prepared I am, so you all may rest easy in that regard. [Here's the point, however, where you want specifics, right? Well, nothing I got was nearly as exciting as Frenchie's ARMANI SKIRT. Seriously. How's that?! Raise your virtual hand if you want Ms. F. to send in a pic.]

Upon my return, however, I encounter the following:

1. Email message from an adjunct instructor in my little academic unit backing out of teaching for the fall semester. 11 days before it begins.

2. Email message from the world's most horrific graduate student, indicating that she intends for me to direct her thesis. [She's not asking, mind you. She's informing me that I've been chosen.]

3. Email stating that the first department meeting of the semester will occur on the first day of classes, and all of the most controversial issues are on the table immediately.

4. The Public Relations office "doesn't have time" to produce a flyer for the series that my colleague and I have been working to put together.

5. One of my adjuncts for the spring is pregnant, and thus will only make it through half of the semester. However, she hasn't informed me of this yet, so I can't explain to her what a difficult spot this puts me in, because her topics course is too specific to find a mid-semester replacement.

6. Email message with the schedule of meetings for chairs and directors to meet with the dean. They happen every two weeks.

7. Email stating that my inter-library loan books are overdue, and thus I've been blocked from the system until I pay my fine.

I think there might be more, but I'm blocking them out. Welcome to the fall semester, kids. Let the games begin!

Thank God I have new shoes.