Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Twin Urbania Peaks

I'm currently in the middle of overpacking for my trip and trying to finish up work before I go. What a great way to spend my last 12 hours at home!! Let's take a poll. Say that the next two weeks of your life include the following activities: going to classes, working in a computer lab, attending a few "parties" for the workshop, walking around the steamy Midwest, going to a gym. How many articles of clothing do you need to cover the bottom half of your body? (Right now I'm at 7: 3 pair of capri pants for daily wear; a pair of jeans (possible for casual party); a pair of shorts (see steamy Midwest); a pair of dress pants or skirt (for more uptight party); pair of gym pants. Too much? Too little? Just right? Call me Goldilocks!

The other thing I have to tell y'all is that I had the most David Lynch experience today. I had to send a pair of shoes back to Zappos, bless them, with their "print out the UPS label and drop it in a pick-up box" policy. Googlemaps says that the nearest box is a mile from my house, so I swing by on my way home. The street address lands me in front of the "Urbania Department of Mental Hygiene." {My house is a mile from here? That should be good for resale!] I park and try the door. A voice mumbles incomprehensibly to me from the intercom. The door swings open. There is a huge glassed-in reception desk in front of me. I walk to the side with the window, and a little person (literally) in a state uniform is there to greet me. "Do you have a UPS drop box?" "Yeees, eets over thhherre." [That's my best approximation of an Eastern European accent.] I opened the drop box expecting to find a human ear or Naomi Watts or something equally surreal and disturbing. Needless to say, it was empty.

If Lynch is going to take 5 years to film Inland Empire, then I suggest his next feature should be "Urbania." Let's see if Laura Dern will drag her skinny ass to the Northeast.



Blogger Beth said...

Very cool. Did zee leetle person snap his fingers to an unheard beat as you walked out?

I had a good omen last Friday: A little-person couple were in my coffee shop, with a big baby carriage.

Thursday, May 31, 2007 9:51:00 PM  

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