My Other Boyfriend

I'm sitting in my new office, still actively loving it. It apparently has some sort of magic capability to accept box after box of books and still have room for more. How does that work?! I'm emptying out shelves at home like an a deranged, opposite magpie, and still there's bookshelf space up in here. Maybbe they're all going into a different dimension--Borges library, perhaps. As I'm rearranging in wonder, I'm listening to Pandora, the savior of all of us who keep forgetting to download music onto office computers. Somehow, I built an Elvis Costello channel that brings up Toad the Wet Sprocket, The Rolling Stones, and The Finn Brothers. I have no idea what kind of freaky Music Genome connects those four, but it has led me into atavistic reveries about Neil Finn, my other boyfriend.

We're all on the same page here, right? Neil Finn, of Split Enz, Crowded House, The Finn Brothers, etc. He also does a particularly charming little duet with Jonatha Brooke on her CD Steady Pull, as well. I liked all of these bands separately (CH most enthusiastically), but it took me years to figure out that Finn was the consistent element across all of them. It must have been the duet that did it; I don't love the lyrics of the song, really (there's something about the way that they emote as they sing the word "uniform" that kills it for me), but I do clearly remember hearing it for the first time and thinking "I want Neil Finn to be my boyfriend."

Oh, come on. Like you've never had that thought? It doesn't have to be about NF specifically. Fill in the blank with your own crush. There you go. Now answer the question.

Right. So Finn. Here's the thing: I'm a sucker for the evocative lyric. "Walking round the room singing 'Stormy Weather'"? Check. "It never used to be that bad/neither was it great./Something in the middle then/Content and much too safe"? Check. Interesting, this longstanding crush I have. When I see a picture of Neil Finn, it doesn't really do anything for me (sorry Neil). But the lyric. Ain't that just what it's all about? (Hell, I'd crush on Joni Mitchell if she were only a baritone.) Are they cheesy? Sure enough. But they're just enough on this side of cliche that they make me go all jelly-kneed.

So imagine my surprise when I downloaded "Last One Standing" from iTunes. Catchy? Yep. Evocative? Indeed. But methinks my other boyfriend has gone over the edge, or else I'm losing my close-reading skillz. Because what on earth is this song about?! Lyrics are here and appear, at a glance, to be correct. Anyone who cares to further my illicit affair with a singer-songwriter by proposing an interpretation---the comment section is open.